A client was exploring this after making an error at work – nothing major but they found it hard to move on. It needed a closer look.

Guess what happened?

When the art was nearly complete it wouldn’t stick together and completely fell apart even though it was a seemingly simple process. The art reflecting life gave us an opportunity to unpack its meaning. Their reaction was priceless – they got the giggles and couldn’t stop laughing, a very different reaction to what had happened at work. In this release they were able to recognise that the art reminded them that they could let it go and don’t need to stay in their harsh analysis of self – that we are all human and that means that we make human ‘mistakes’ – and it certainly doesn’t make you a bad person.

This week I have also witnessed a very public misunderstanding online and boy did the haters come out to play. No wonder you can be extra hard on yourself when others get nasty and attack personally. I won’t enter into the dynamics of this particular situation, but the harshness showed up on steroids from the keyboard critics. It’s no wonder why your mind can spin out of control when things don’t go to plan or we have a moment of misjudgement, emotion or error.

I would like to challenge everyone who sat behind their keyboard and took a jab – where does your reaction come from? What is driving it? What is that emotional charge about for you?  How can you work through what is happening for you when you have such a viscous reaction? Of course you can have an opinion but to criticise in such a personal poisonous way says more about you, your projections (we all have them!) and what you need to take a closer look at than those that you are attacking.

We judge ourselves for being human and not having it perfect all the time – those messages have come from somewhere (often early in life) and I fear that we living  in a place where being perfect is the expectation – I hate to burst your bubble but life is not like that. First and foremost you are human – and none of us have it all together all of the time.

We could all take a bit from my clients art work – at the end it was powerful as the pieces that stuck together formed a heart shape. Yep that’s what we need – a lot more love to ourselves and those around us. Let’s remember that we are all human, and we need to be given some slack sometimes.

The post Have we forgot what it is like to be human? appeared first on Ignite Art Therapies.

Amelia and I talk about the importance of acknowledging where you are at and I give you few ideas on how you can reflect on who you want to be in life.

Some points from the podcast include…

The start of the year can be a great time to reset and recalibrate – but this can happen anytime

Getting older can be exciting

At our Create your 2020 Vision workshop on 18th of January – you will acknowledge how you are right now – the good bad and ugly. What you have learned as well as looking at what gets in the way and you get what you want.

Having a conversation with someone else, being witnessed, writing things down or expressing creatively is a powerful way to acknowledge and be accountable for what you want.

Life is the whole spectrum! not just the highlight reel

Setting goals is not just about career. Its is about relationships, spiritual, physical, mental, emotional and well being.

Some questions to ask yourself when considering your goals – Who do you want to be? How do you want to feel? What experiences do you want to have? What/who do you want to be connected to? What do you value? What do you love? What doesn’t serve you anymore?

Click below to have a listen of our full conversation – I would love your thoughts.

The post Make 2020 Your Best Year Yet! appeared first on Ignite Art Therapies.

This may seem like a random comment out of context but yesterday this message hit home when a participant in my workshop realised that the character they chose (the giraffe) had this powerful message.

Authenticity is a buzz word now a days but what does that actually mean in the reality of life?

It raises many questions including why you alter yourself to fit in with others. Are there real or imagined expectations about who you are and you feel the need to edit who you are in order to keep the peace and make others comfortable. The rules of how you should be, what you need to do with life, the pressure to be a certain way, holding different responsibilities and having to adjust to perform certain roles in this world can certainly have you on a different path.

While it may be exhausting it can also serve you – to feel part of something. Yet as time goes on if the way you are living life doesn’t align with who you are, you can feel completely misunderstood, invisible, the pressure builds and you are completely misaligned with your values which then leads to a path of isolation, feeling wrong and void that is very hard to explain.

So what do you do with this?

I am not sure there is a quick fix answer in how you be true to who you are – if you have the answer I would love you to share it with me. How do you come to accept all of you, the real you? It is an ongoing process of self awareness and sometimes that means the hard yards of working through expectations, life long messages and tapping into your own needs. Self love and self compassion are an ongoing process and in the end a giraffe needs to be a giraffe and stop trying to be something its not. Our differences are what makes this an interesting, curious, diverse place to be.

The post ‘A giraffe just needs to be a giraffe’ appeared first on Ignite Art Therapies.

Ideally it becomes what you do every day – you know that its beneficial to eat well, move your body, do something for your mind but it can be completely overwhelming and the first thing to go when stuff hits the fan.  A vicious cycle of you need to do such and such to feel better but only if you felt better you could do such and such.

There can be a bombardment of what you ‘should’ do but often this ends in feeling helpless, inadequate and full of shame when completing a full list of tasks is actually out of reach due to poor mental health. First and fore most it’s about working out what works for you in the moment – asking yourself what do I need right now?

Sometimes you can get through the whole list of strategies but other times it’s a case of doing one thing to get through the day.

The list of how to managing wellbeing can be really long but I want keep it simple as sometimes we get frozen in overcomplicating things and become stuck. it’s not always about pampering or special things (although they are nice), take some time to ponder what works for you in managing your wellbeing and how these themes/concepts relate to you, then go do that!

SPACE
Do you have an unconditional space where you can offload and explore exactly what is happening for you? Even as someone that has the skills and holds deep space for others, I can’t do that for myself – it is so so important to have space for you to ponder connect, reflect and work though life. While family and friends can be great – they also can get in your way as they rescue, protect, project and bring up history that may not be that useful. Wouldn’t it be great to have ‘maintenance’ check ups with a therapist so that you aren’t out in the wilderness when crisis hits. Having a safe trusted space is the best thing to work through stuff – it can take a while to find the right fit so shop around and don’t be put off if the first person you come across is not working for you.

NOURISH – this is not just about eating good food although that is important too. It is about considering what you consume, the people that you surround yourself with, doing things that give to your life rather than being filled with ‘have to’s’, obligation, burden or dread. Do the things that light a spark, take notice of what floats your boat make it a priority and do more of that unapologetically.

CONNECTION

 One of the best connections you can make is to yourself and what you need. Getting some time to reflect and connect to what is going on in your life adds to your wellbeing – whether it be mediating, having a good think, tapping into your felt sense or journaling, time to reflect, ponder and consider what you need is important. It doesn’t stop there though, we are born to connect with others so why not make it with people that you actually enjoy being with – those that have you feeling good about being alive, that connect with you, bring curiosity, you have fun with and you feel part of something.

OUTSOURCE – you hear this in business all the time but how often do you do it in your own life. Are there some things that you don’t have to actually do yourself and the pressure will be released by delegating or accepting help. Is it a case of having a cleaner so that at least once a week or fortnight you have everything in order and clean – not matter how long that lasts! Maybe its getting pre made meals as the thought of going round the supermarket and deciding what to cook is too much. Is it getting a gardener to literally and metaphorically take the weeds away. I am sure you get my drift.

BE RATHER THAN DO–

How often do you feel guilty for doing ‘nothing’ or doing something that you enjoy when there is a massive list of things to do. Often you are ‘on’ all the time and need some time to be rather than be busy, busy busy all the time. There is a myriad of things that you can do to feel good and sometimes it’s just about being in the moment, letting the rest of the world go on hold for a while so you can recharge. Play sport, get in nature, be creative, listen to music, meditate, take notice of the wonderous things in life, play, connect, go outside, be creative, laugh, escape in a book or movie, watch the sunset, get a massage – what ever it is, it is important that you put busy on hold so that you can fill your wellness cup up.

What do you do with all if this?

Consider what works for you – what are the things that have you feeling better, that have you being in life rather than an observer, the things that balance out your challenges and have you  work through your mental health rather than have it bottle up and explode or withdraw completely. Wellness is ongoing in your life and no matter where you are on the wellness wheel of life consider what works for you and do more of that.

The post Practical Ways to Manage Wellbeing appeared first on Ignite Art Therapies.

My mum came rushing down but the funny bit is she came with a gun!
That seems random but she thought I was saying I was petrified rather than ‘I’ve got petrol in my eyes’ and assumed that there was a snake nearby. Yes I was definitely scared of snakes and she came prepared to do some damage but the situation was a little different to what she expected. Regardless of whether it was a snake or not, I was frozen, couldn’t see and I needed assistance.

There are times when we need help, we can’t do it alone and that’s why I value what I do so much. I never know what is going to come up in a session but one things for sure I am prepared for what ever needs to be expressed and value holding space for my clients to gain clarity to navigate this thing called life.

By the way Mum whipped me into the car drove frantically back to the house, got me in the shower to spend ages washing out my eyes – thankfully it turned out all right and there was no snake to be seen.

If you would like more clarity, come and have a 1:1 session or book into my whole day event Create Your 2020 Vision where you will look at 2019, take the learnings, break through the barriers and see what you want to achieve in 2020. Follow this link to book in https://ignitearttherapies.com.au/…/create-your-2020-vision/

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To listen click on the image about or the link below

https://theconflictcoach.com.au/2019/10/17/e12-bel-ryan-tapping-into-the-creative-self/

The post Podcast Guest with The Conflict Coach. appeared first on Ignite Art Therapies.

What did we do?
The frustration went into the art – ripping, pounding, mixing. throwing, burning, sorting, transforming and externalising allowed it to be put somewhere and shift it. The person that walked out of my studio had a very different demeanour to the one that walked in.
Will they get angry again – yes most definitely. Will they have experiences that trigger them – yep, that too. But for today they were able to acknowledge, express, grieve, shift and move into a space where the frustration has been dealt with. Next time it arises the charge that was present today won’t be adding to the force as the pressure has been released rather than building up and exploding.

Let me know if you have something that needs some air time to release, transform and let go.

The post They were really annoyed! appeared first on Ignite Art Therapies.

I will never forget when I was about 8 I had to learn to do things with my right hand as something went a little bit wrong.with the left.

My sister and I were playing gymnastics at the bus stop on the farm and for once I was actually beating her at balancing on the fence. She said quick ‘I can hear the bus coming’ so I rushed and my manoeuvre ended up with me falling and my left arm copping the brunt of the fall.

I was really hurt and I told her not to tell anyone because I was embarrassed,didn’t want to cause a fuss and somehow thought it would just go away.

I was a little bit annoyed when she told the bus driver as next minute the bus stopped and everyone was inspecting the damage –  my sister knew that we needed help but as a shy retiring type I wanted to keep it to myself. It was a tad overwhelming as the bus even stopped off at local deli (with all the other kids on the bus) to get ice etc.

One thing led to another the school couldn’t get in touch with parents as Dad was out in the paddock and someone had to go and find him and Mum was in Adelaide visiting my brothers at boarding school. In great country community spirit one of the teachers drove me to the hospital which was 50 km away and waited with me until my Dad could get there. I ended up having surgery as it was broken in two places and come to think of it – I wonder how I would have gone not telling anyone – not very good I suspect.

The point is that even though we don’t want to make a fuss, can be a little bit shy and think we can handle things ourselves, sometimes there is a community of people around us and experts that can assist us when things are broken.

That goes for many things including our body, minds, emotions, spirit. This arm was not going to heal itself without my sister seeking help, the others travelling with me and the expert doctors and nurses pinning along with giving it time to heal.

When I think about it this story is a bit like therapy. You may think that its easier to keep things to yourself, that you want to hide what is happening, that you can handle it on your own but just like my broken arm – getting support and people that know what to do are necessary to heal.

I had to learn to do things with my right hand while in plaster for six weeks – it was a little awkward, uncomfortable but after a while it became new way of doing things. The advantage is that I can still do things both left and right handed (well almost!) Imagine what new things you can learn and new ways of being by seeking the help you need.

The post Lessons from the left. appeared first on Ignite Art Therapies.

This surface has held some big stuff and provided a solid space for what ever needed to unfold. It has seen the masks of ‘I have it all together’ come off and has sat with the vulnerability, the stress, the fragility of life.
I wonder what it would say if it could speak – come to think of it it would have so much confidential stuff, it couldn’t actually say much!

It has been part of expressing fears, anxieties, stress, disconnection, pain. sadness, the darkness, the excitement and the crazy ideas that seem out of reach.

It has held the contents to see possibilities, to make life changes, to gain confidence, take leaps of faith, change direction, dream and acknowledge what is really going on.

It has helped challenge the ‘shoulds’ or ‘have to’s’, assisted client see that they are a priority, transformed and broken through barriers, bought some colour to the darkness, assisted in making big decisions, let go of what no longer serves and supported new refreshing perspectives and outlooks.
It has held a trusting space for potential, for change, for telling stories and the important stuff that needed to be looked at.

So even though it is just a piece of furniture, its no wonder I felt a little sentimental taking it out of the studio. Its been part of so many explorations whether they be straight out expression or unexpected revelations, it has been a solid part of every person that has sat at it and has held the nurturing food/refreshments in the shared space of workshops.

It has been on one hell of a ride together but the time has come for the new surface to take the load – lets hope it is up for it! I know I am.

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I chose some soft pastels to get the foggy, confusing, cloudy, funky feelings out on the page. Surprise, Surprise there were grey and blacks but also coloured that were smudged into the image, Nothing was clear, it was dreary, undefined and somewhat trapped and mushed in together. A pretty valid representation on what is oozing away for me.

Instinctively I knew that I needed to rub it, to make some of it come off the page – that required my touch and some hard work (yep I am listening metaphor!) to lighten the colour. It needed a little more treatment to change it.

Enter the fire – it was time to burn it down to ashes. With each flame something shifted, changed, altered and was a little lighter.

There were now ashes from the page along with some pastel dust that were made into a paste. Its was like the remnants of the process were all in one place, where it can be in another form. As I sat with it and rubbed it through my hands I knew it was time for it to be let go, to be released, to go on its way. Turning the tap on, washing my hands of it and letting it all go was the final chapter for this confusing what ever it is.  

This wasn’t planned out, the art informed as it went and the meaning reveal itself along the way. While reflecting on what was happening, I was discovering, expressing and exploring what the art had to say for itself in relation to my life.  Some of it hasn’t even been named as it doesn’t have to be, that’s the beauty of creativity – it can describe the thing that you can’t find words for.

You could have the exact same feeling and start an image with soft pastels too but the paths that you take with your art will be vastly different to what happened here – you are an individual and on any given day your expression can play out in a myriad of different ways. The doing, the symbolism, metaphor, the reflection, the meaning all take shape in the experience. It is a wonderful way to explore, discover, connect, let go and transform.

Let me know if you would like to come and explore what is happening for you – the art has a way of connecting to you and together we discover how it reflects live and what you need to do with it.

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