Every now and then there seems to be a theme that is everywhere and this has definitely been the case in the last week or so with my clients. I have noticed a struggle to be able to share what is happening with them, a struggle to be totally vulnerable and share with those around them.
It is like the stuff they are dealing with is inside and just won’t come out. It’s trapped inside and sometimes tries to come to the surface but isn’t able to come out as it gets jammed in the throat and is choking them. That’s where art therapy can help, it gives a safe space without having to explain it and fond the words.
I have talked about this before and have been reminded me in the past couple of weeks about the things that stops us from being able to express fully…
Is it that we don’t want to upset those around us? Is it that in the past we have been told to suck it up and get on with it? Is it that someone has made fun of us for showing our vulnerability? Have we had drama around showing emotion when we don’t need it? Has it become gossip rather than being kept in a scared space? Have others made it about themselves so we feel we can’t express because it becomes about them? Are our nearest and dearest not available? Are we scared of the consequences of our emotions? Do we play the role of having it all together so we can’t lift the mask and be human? Have others expectations to ‘beat this’ have us feeling like we have no choice? Have we been hurt before by trust being broken?
All of these reasons have been true for my clients (and if the truth be known for me too at different stges) and I have heard all of these explanations in the past little while. Without feeling safe enough to express what is happening has them suffering alone, being shut down and withdrawn and not being able to get any enjoyment out of life. Without being able to express the lows, it can be very hard to express the highs and even if we pretend they are there, the highs have no substance and we cant connect fully to them.
I am very privileged to be able to hold the space in my therapy room that allows people to express what they need to express, even when its not easy. Sometimes it is others discomfort or not knowing what to do that has them behaving on a particular way and prevent us fully opening up – I think that having therapy, mentoring or coaching should be compulsory as it great having someone neutral to express fully without having to choke on our silenced words. Wouldn’t it be wonderful if it was something that we just did and not have any stigma with sharing what’s really going on and seeking professional help
My hope is that you can all find that safe space with someone who knows what to do so that you can offload some of the things that may not be going so well. I hope that you can express to really help to live life to the full.
Have a great expressive week